Have you ever noticed how different it feels when someone specifically invites you to join something, versus just seeing an open invitation? There’s something incredibly powerful about hearing the words: “We’d love to have you here,” or even a simple, “Want to sit with us?” These personal invitations can completely change how we experience opportunities around us, including our faith.
GOING TO WHERE THEY ARE
That’s what we believe in Young Life. We believe in the power of the personal invitation, but it’s not on our terms; we believe in going to where adolescents are. It’s one of our core beliefs and it’s something you’ll hear Young Life staff and leaders mention time after time. We go to where kids are. We go to where adolescents are. We enter their world.
It’s pretty fun too! There are countless stories where Young Life leaders have kids, or even parents, come up to them and ask, “Why are you here?” They’re a little surprised, and most definitely curious, about why an adult would want to intentionally go to a place where most adults don’t even consider going.”
“Wait, you want to come see me play in a basketball game?”
“Why are you an assistant coach when you don’t even have a kid on the team?”
“You don’t even have a student at this school; why would you come to our band concert?”
We’ve heard questions like these more times than we can count and we’ve seen the questions in people’s expressions too. But, going to where teens are is exactly what Jesus did with the people he encountered. He didn’t just open up applications for disciple positions and wait for the most qualified candidates to apply. Instead, he went right up to people — regular, everyday people — and said, “Come, follow me.” He met them right where they were, doing their everyday things, and invited them into something bigger.
There’s something profound about going to where kids are. We see it with our Young Life clubs as we pursue middle school, high school, and college students. We also see it with our Young Life “friends-for-life,” or the adults in our communities too! We all love it when someone comes to US!
EXTENDING AN INVITATION
Think about this: right now, there is probably someone in your school who stands at the edge of every gathering, wanting to join in but unsure if they really belong. Maybe you’ve been that person. Maybe you are that person. It’s not just about being shy — it’s about that deep-down need we all have to know we’re truly wanted somewhere.
Let’s be honest, whether talking about an adolescent or an adult, we all carry around different levels of self-consciousness. You might look at an opportunity and think, “That looks amazing, but they probably want someone more outgoing/talented/experienced than me.” Or maybe you’ve thought, “If they wanted me there, they would have asked.” Sound familiar? I’ve been there too, and I’ve talked to countless others who feel the same way.
Here’s what’s fascinating about our brains: when someone personally invites us to something, it triggers a completely different response than when we have to take that first step ourselves. It’s like our brain has a special circuit that lights up when someone says, “I thought of you specifically for this.” Suddenly, all those worried thoughts about whether we belong start to quiet down.
ADULTS AND ADOLESCENTS ALIKE
And you know what? This isn’t just a teenage thing. We’ve seen adults in their 40s and 50s hesitate to join committees or community groups because they weren’t sure if they were really wanted. I’ve watched talented musicians never join worship teams because they thought, “If they needed me, they’d ask.” We’re all just humans wanting to know we matter.
Think about your own life for a minute. When was the last time someone specifically invited you to be part of something? Remember how that felt? Pretty amazing, right? That’s because a personal invitation sends three powerful messages: “I see you,” “I value you,” and “I want you here.” It’s like getting a permission slip to be yourself.
For those of us involved in ministry or leadership, this changes everything about how we build Young Life ministry. Instead of expecting that kids will just show up at our clubs each week, we go to them first and invite them, invest in building a friendship and earn the right to share more.
Want to know the coolest part? This kind of invitation creates a beautiful chain reaction. When someone experiences the joy of being personally invited, they often become the best at noticing and inviting others. They remember what it felt like to be on the outside looking in, so they become bridge-builders themselves.
So here’s our collective challenge: look around your world this week. Who’s hovering on the edges of your community? Who might be waiting for someone to say, “We want you here”? In a world that often celebrates the bold go-getters, there’s something beautifully Christlike about reaching out first and creating space for others to belong.
Remember, sometimes the most important ministry doesn’t happen through big programs or events — it happens in those simple moments when we take the initiative to go to where others are. At the end of the day, we’re all just people hoping someone will make space for us to be ourselves.
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SOME HELPFUL RESOURCES
In Young Life, the concept of going to teens first and earning the right to be heard before sharing our own story is just one of the foundational concepts that drive how and why we do things. Here are a few great resources to see where this foundation, and other foundations, started and learn about the early years of Young Life.
Dance, Children, Dance by Jim Rayburn III – A thoughtful overview of Jim Rayburn II’s life and journey to the formation of Young Life ministry as well as early years of the mission’s growth. Stories around the earliest Young Life camping properties are also included here, many of which are still in use today!
The Diaries of Jim Rayburn – Take a peek into the prayer life of Jim Rayburn throughout his tenure in Young Life. For over 30 years Jim Rayburn kept a journal and this book shares excerpts from these entries. His life was one of tremendous consequence, unbelievable devotion to Christ, incredible highs, and soul-crushing lows.
Friends for Life – This is the inspiring story of Mal McSwain and his decades of simple but profound ministry — “a ministry of accompaniment” — in the lives of thousands. Over the years Mal practiced the simple principle of “being there” for countless people, exhibiting for them the love and grace of Jesus, first with high school students in North Carolina, California, and Georgia, and later with adults around the country.
Letters to a Young Life Leader – One of the first people to come to faith in Christ through the ministry of Young Life, Bob Mitchell, rose through its ranks to fill every conceivable position in the ministry, from being a club kid in Jim Rayburn’s legendary “Club 37” all the way to serving for a decade as the mission’s president. Written in the form of 37 letters to the Young Life family, Letters to a Young Life Leader is like sitting down and having a conversation with Mitch himself. Combining humility, deep spiritual wisdom, and Mitchell’s trademark humor and gentle spirit, you will find each letter to be a gem worth reading over and over.A Life Worth Living – Chuck Reinhold, a minister and longtime Young Life staff member, offers a grand view of his life and the principles he’s learned through his 50-plus years of ministry. He started ministries that have helped countless men and women meet Christ and grow in their faith ― from ministry leaders like Joni Eareckson Tada to missionaries in Ethiopia to pastors, youth leaders, doctors, teachers, moms. and dads. A Life Worth Living features principles anyone can use to further their Kingdom impact and demonstrate the impact one person’s faithfulness can have on so many.
